How to Pet a Cat

Cats get a bad reputation for not wanting to be as cuddly as dogs, but the truth is, many cat breeds enjoy being petted and receiving affection from their owners. However, cats do need to be approached properly. Understanding how your cat likes to be petted can make it a positive experience for both of you, and one that can strengthen your bond even deeper. In this article, we will explain how to pet a cat, common misconceptions about cat behavior, and why cats like to be petted.

Do Cats Like Being Petted?

Many cats enjoy being petted, especially by their owners. Petting can be a form of bonding. It can also mimic grooming behaviors that mother cats do to their kittens. Some cats do not like to be petted or have a preferred way to be petted, so owners must be able to read their cat’s behavior and act accordingly so that petting is a positive experience, not a negative one.

Just like humans, some cats don’t like physical touch, while others crave it. It’s important to get to know your pet and observe their individual behaviors. Learning where and how your cat likes to be petted can be a great way to bond and build a strong, lasting relationship with your cat.

Do Cats Like Butt Scratches?

Where to pet a cat is somewhat of a controversial topic, as some cats seem to enjoy butt scratches and having the base of their tail and or lower back scratched. Others cannot stand it. The tail has nerve endings, which can make this a sensitive spot for some cats. To gauge whether or not your cat likes butt scratches – or any touch – pay attention to their body language and behavior when you respectfully touch their tail area. If they lean into the touch or raise their tails, they are likely enjoying it. If they twitch or move away, then they likely don’t enjoy having their butt scratched.

Difference Between Petting and Patting a Cat

While they sound the same, “petting” and “patting” are two different ways to interact with your cat. To pet, you should gently and continuously stroke a cat’s body, going in the same direction as the fur. This is soothing and enjoyable for most cat breeds, especially those that thrive on human touch like Ragdolls and Burmese.

Patting is different. Patting involves repeatedly tapping a cat in the same spot, something a cat might find less enjoyable, especially if it’s patting near their butts. Some cats might be able to handle patting, but most prefer the continuous strokes of petting.

Find out what your cat likes and stick with it so that your cat knows what to expect when you are giving them physical affection. They may like one type of contact, such as scratching in one area, and another type of contact, such as petting, on some other part of their body. It’s best to get to know your cat through their response and body language so you can form a deep and trustworthy bond. Keep in mind that cats have a threshold for contact; at a certain point, they won’t enjoy it anymore. It’s important to continue to watch and respond to their behavioral cues to make it an enjoyable experience for all.

Do Cats Like to Be Petted Hard?

Unlike some dogs that might enjoy a stiff pet, cats generally do not like a lot of pressure or force. Hard cat petting can be uncomfortable and stressful, and it can lead to negative touch associations. Soft, light, and gentle strokes are best if your cat is willing to let you pet them. You’ll know you’re successful when your cat purrs or leans into you. If they move away, they likely don’t like the pressure you are using, and you should adapt your strokes – or they may not like being petted at all.

Where Do Cats Like to Be Touched?

All cats are different, but most cats like to be touched in certain areas, such as:

1. Their head: Many cats like being gently scratched on top of their head with light pressure. Think of it like a kitty scalp massage.
2. Their cheeks: A cat’s face has scent glands that some cats like to have stroked.
3. Their chin: A gentle curl of your fingers under a cat’s chin might make them purr happily.
4. The base of their ears: Ears have a lot of sensitive nerve endings, and some cats might enjoy being scratched at the base of their ears.
5. Their back: Many cats enjoy long, gentle, continuous strokes with light pressure on their backs. This can mimic grooming habits their mothers did to them as kittens.

Where Do Cats Not Like to be Touched? 

All cats have different preferences, but most cats do not enjoy being touched in certain spots, such as:

1. Their belly: Unlike dogs, some cats don’t like their bellies rubbed. It’s too sensitive an area, and cats might find belly rubbing to be stressful rather than comforting.
2. Their paws: Many cats don’t like their paws touched. It’s a sensitive area, and paws are a cat’s main tool for self-defense. Therefore, touching their paws can feel like a threat.
3. Their tail: Some cats don’t like their tails touched. Others might not like their butts scratched. The tail and rump area has a lot of nerve endings, and touching them there can make them anxious rather than relaxed.  

It’s important to respect a cat’s boundaries and pay attention to their body language and behavior to determine what they do and don’t like. Most of the time, a cat will move away from you if you hit a sensitive area, but they could show discomfort in other ways, including tail swishing, hissing, mouthing or biting, or increased meowing.  

While certain areas are likely to be completely off-limits, you can build up a cat’s tolerance for grooming touches – think nail trims, teeth brushing, and ear cleaning – by being patient and consistent and by using positive reinforcement. These grooming practices are all part of having a happy and healthy cat and are vital, as are regular vet checkups.  

Do Some Cat Breeds Like to Be Petted More Than Others?

A cat’s personality will play more into their preferences than their breed characteristics, but some breeds do like human touch more than others, such as:

• Ragdolls: Ragdoll cats are known for their dog-like tendencies, including loving human touch. They love a good cuddle.
• Maine Coons: Maine Coon cats are playful and friendly, and that includes being open to human touch.
• Sphynx: These hairless cats love snuggling, and it’s not just to keep themselves warm. A Sphynx might make himself at home in your bed or curl up in your lap.
• Birmans: Affectionate and warm, these cats bond with their owners and seek out affection.
• Siamese: Social and outgoing, Siamese cats love being around people. They crave human interaction.
• Scottish Folds: Easygoing and affectionate, Scottish Fold cats love being petted or sitting in your lap.

How to Properly Pet a Cat

If you have a new cat or are meeting someone’s cat for the first time, it’s super important to approach the cat in the right way to lay the groundwork for physical touch as a positive experience. Follow these steps to properly pet a cat and to touch a cat without getting scratched:

1. Let the cat initiate contact: Cats are famously aloof, and if you try to rush the process, it might scare them off you. Let a cat approach you first.
2. Offer your hand: Slowly extend your hand in a gentle fist and leave it there for the cat to sniff it and bunt if they deem you worthy.
3. Do a gut check: If your cat doesn’t offer contact, they’re likely not interested. It’s best not to push through and try to force the contact.
4. Let them bunt: If you’ve gotten the go-ahead from your cat’s body language, you can move on to bunting, which is where they rub their faces and bodies against you. Where they rub is likely where they prefer to be petted, such as their face.
5. Offer head scratches: If the cat seems into you, start by giving a gentle cat massage to their head or the tops of their cheeks.
6. Use gentle strokes: While all cats are different, most cats that enjoy human touch enjoy being gently, consistently stroked on their backs. Keep pressure light and move in the direction of their fur. Pet them, don’t pat them.
7. Pay attention: It can be easy to get wrapped up in the experience of petting a cat, but pay attention to their body language and behavior, as this is their main form of communication.
8. Respect their boundaries: Cats will let you know when they are done. Respect their need for space and keep petting sessions short to prevent them from becoming overstimulated or overwhelmed, which might cause them to exhibit negative behavior such as hiding or hissing. 

Conclusion 

Some cats don’t like to be petted, and that is okay. But many breeds enjoy physical human touch. If approached the right way by paying attention to a cat’s behavior and preferences, a pet owner can have a wonderful bonding experience with their cat.

For more expert tips on caring for your cat, explore our other understanding cats articles.