How Long Does a Cat Hold a Grudge?

Thanks to their unique personalities and mysterious ways, it can be hard to gauge what’s going on in a cat’s furry little head. One thing is for sure though, cats can be aloof. Some people might even think that their cat is holding a grudge against them. In this article, we’ll explore whether or not a cat can hold a grudge, how long a cat holds a grudge, and signs your cat is mad at you, among others.

Can Cats Hold Grudges?

The short answer is no, cats can’t hold grudges. Cats don’t have or process emotions the way that humans do. If you’re wondering if cats have a sense of time or a concept of time, they don’t. They don’t have the time or mental capacity to plot revenge, get jealous, or let a grudge fester. However, they do have really good memories and can form negative associations with people or things. They remember what caused them stress or anxiety, and they could potentially react the same way they did the first time they encountered that person, place, thing, or situation. A common example is that cats will hide or jump up on something high if they see their cat carrier come out, as they associate it with a trip to the vet. Cats might avoid or act defensively, but not out of spite. It’s pure biology at work. 

How Long Does a Cat’s Memory Last?

To understand how long cats hold grudges and if cats have a concept of time, you need to understand how their brains work. They have short- and long-term memories, but it’s different from humans. Cats generally live in the present and don’t dwell on the past.

Short-term memory in cats can last only minutes or hours. They can remember things like where they placed a toy last. Long-term memory can last for months or even years. This takes the form of survival information, such as where their food bowl is and where the litter box is. Depending on the cat breed and a cat’s brain, they could even remember things as far back as their adoption. 

What Do Cats Hate That Can Cause a Grudge?

Cats don’t hold grudges like humans do, but they can form negative associations. The list of what irritates cats can vary. What cats dislike might include:

• Water. While some cats enjoy playing with water, like the Turkish Van, most won’t appreciate being bathed or splashed. 
• Car rides. Many cats associate the car with going to the vet, which is a stressful experience. 
• Loud noises. Sudden or loud sounds can stress a cat out. 
• Unwanted touching. Some cats don’t enjoy being picked up. While Ragdolls adore it, breeds like Russian Blues dislike it. 
• Strangers. Certain breeds, like Scottish Folds and Persians, are wary of strangers. They may associate new people with threats.

If a cat has a negative association with something, it can continue to repeat that behavior. For example, if a smoke detector alarm goes off and it spooks a cat, every time they hear a beep, they might run for cover. Their cat behavior can present like a grudge, but it’s really just a survival instinct.

Signs a Cat is Mad at You

Just like jealousy and grudges, cats don’t get mad, but they can present as if something is off. They will let you know through their behavior or body language that they feel a certain way. A few of the ways a cat will let you know they are frustrated or unhappy include:

• Hiding
• Flattening their ears or swishing their tails
• Hissing, loudly or excessively meowing, or growling
• Panting or grimacing, which might look like a cat smile
• Refusing treats 
• Avoiding you 
• Going to the bathroom outside the litter box
• Destructive behavior like scratching things other than scratching posts

Each breed and individual cat will have its own way of responding. For example, a Manx cat might take weeks to warm up to a new person, while a Maine Coon might express frustration by knocking things off a countertop. A Siamese might let you know vocally how they’re unhappy, while a Bengal cat can be very dramatic and get aggressive through play. Responses and reactions will vary as more factors, such as socialization, lifestyle, training, genetics, and general life experience, are at play, too.

Do Cats Forgive?

Since cats don’t process emotions the way humans do, the good news is that their “grudges” don’t last. They might make negative associations, but they don’t hold onto those feelings. They live in the moment and process those threats as they come, rather than sit and stew about them the way a human might. They will return to their regular behavior fairly quickly after experiencing a stressful situation that might present as a “grudge.”

Their memories might be short, but if they have repeated trauma or consistent negative interactions, it can take longer to rebuild their trust. Rescue cats are a good example of this, but also a good example of how, if you put in the time, effort, and consistency, it can pay off.

How to Earn a Cat’s Trust

If you feel like your cat might be acting differently towards you, then you can take some steps to try and get the relationship back on the right paw:

1. Maintain a consistent routine. A predictable schedule and routine can help make a cat feel safe and not scared.
2. Give them space. Just like humans, they might need some space to cool off. Let them come to you when they are ready. Respect their boundaries. 
3. Offer positive reinforcement. Things your cat likes, such as treats and playtime, can help bring back positive associations. Be patient and consistent with rewards. 
4. Make them feel at ease. Some cats respond better to soft speaking and slow movements. Allow them to observe you acting calmly. 
5. Use calming products. Pheromone products and supplements can help reduce a cat’s stress and anxiety.
   Remember that every cat and their reactions will be different, but these are generally good places to start on repairing a relationship. Honor your individual cat’s preferences, and they should be back to their happy, affectionate selves in no time. 

Conclusion

Cats don’t process emotions or hold grudges like humans do, but they can form negative associations and react accordingly. What looks like a grudge might just be their survival instincts kicking in. By being consistent, patient, loving, and attentive to your cat and their individual needs, you can get back into each other’s good graces quickly.

CTA: For more expert tips on caring for your cat, explore our other understanding cats articles.